Herald Journal Columns
Nov. 18, 2002 Herald
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Tips and tidbits on how to be cheap

By LYNDA JENSEN

I nearly asphyxiated myself laughing at Jim O'Leary's column last week, although I swear he changed the wording from how to be "cheap," to how to be "frugal," the latter of which was much less exciting.

I happen to know a horde of financially conservative people (being married to one), and thought it would be easy to assemble a collection of tips on how to be cheap.

Mind you, I had to chase people over this, and it was a little labor intensive; but it was worth it.

Tips on how to be cheap:

· Work nights and weekends. This will cut down on your social life and naturally the expenses that are associated with it.

Tip by Aaron S.

· Have your wife cook instead of eating out.

Tip by Julie Y. (head cook)

· Don't have a girlfriend.

Tip by Jami B.

· Bargain for everything.

Tip by Denise R.

· Free lunches can be obtained by betting with co-workers for lunch.

Tip by Ryan G.

· You can eat turkey ham sandwiches all week for what it costs to order out one meal.

Tip by Dale K.

· Stuff those little dairy creamers into your purse when you eat out.

(My grandma used to do this).

· Re-use plastic utensils.

Tip by LuAnn D.'s mother-in-law

· Everyone should buy their own Christmas presents.

Annual tip given by my husband,

originally quoted from Newt Gingrich.

· Advertise with Herald Journal Publishing.

Tip by "Kiss-Up" Neil S.

· Split a can of pop with someone.

Brian D.

· Don't spend any money.

Tip by Lue L.

Dixie update

For those who remember Dixie, the cute little German Shepherd puppy that I was advertising a dog house for:

1. She ain't "little" any more.

2. She's still kind of cute in a rough-and-tumble/I'll-scratch-you-to-pieces-by-accident sort of way.

She doesn't mean any harm, but she's a genuine handful ­ although she is very intelligent, especially compared to our previous country dog (that naughty one that got caught in barbed wire, which I wrote about previously).

For example, if she jumps on you and you scream, she will get down pretty quick, and not jump again within five minutes. Our other dog would jump all over you, and it wouldn't matter what you did.

I think we spend so much time with the other dog, Doc ­ the miniature daschund (see photo) ­ that we were lulled into a false sense of security.

Doc's personality can be described as the following:

1. He thinks he's a human, and

2. He's 98 percent motivated by his stomach.

The two are complete opposites. In the photo below, I can tell you what is on their minds. Dixie is wondering what she can knock over next, and Doc is wondering if the camera is a treat dispenser.

Dixie's unofficial nickname is Moose, because she is so bouncy and large (although I have also been known to call her Toilet Breath, too).

When Dixie was younger, Doc could out run her. Now he hides under the kitchen chairs half the time.

I actually saw Dixie try to squash herself under the chairs like Doc.

Incidentally, Dixie is now the proud owner of a "doggy condo" a very nice dog house with maintenance-free siding, made by a family north of Howard Lake. It has insulation on all sides of it, including the floor. Very nice.

She has yet to appreciate it, but she will when the winter kicks in.


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