HJ-ED-DHJHerald Journal Columns
November 5, 2007

That’s one way to get a deer

By Aaron Schultz

Over the years I have been known to give my uncle, and outdoors columnist, Chris Schultz more than a little crap for not bringing down a deer over deer season.

He’s got all the best equipment – buck scent, buck calls, etc., etc.

Meanwhile, I’m lucky if I find my rifle in time to head up north, and even then it’s a 50-50 shot that I actually make it into the woods.

Still, with that all being true, I have still managed to shoot many more deer than the big-time hunter – uncle Chris.

All the good-natured fun I have had at his expense over the years maybe turned out to be not so good-natured after all.

While I have been unable to confirm it with him, I have a hunch that he just might have sacrificed his truck in order to just say that he finally got a deer.

It you look below in this column, you will see a photo of his truck (well, what used to be his truck) upon getting back from a pheasant hunting trip in North Dakota.

On his way back home, a big buck came out of the ditch, and nailed his truck, putting all kinds of damage on it.

For the full story of what happened, according to Chris, turn to page 4B and read his outdoors column.

While I won’t dispute his claim that it was a complete accident, it is curious how this is the way he finally is able to match my deer mark in one way.

I have only ever hit one deer with my car – that coming several years ago on a trip back from Kerkhoven, covering a volleyball game.

To my knowledge, Chris has never hit a deer before last week.

So, by hitting that deer with his truck, he was able to tie me for deer hit by a vehicle.

Knowing that he will never match, or even come close, to shooting as many deer as I have, he must have figured that this way, he could at least be in the same conversation with me on something.

Even with that, though, I was able to hit my deer and sustain much less damage to my vehicle than what he was unable to avoid.

Just look at his truck, it is a wreck. Meanwhile, my car is still kicking, and the damage is really not that bad.

Don’t believe me? Just take a look at my car the next time you see it around. The old damage is still there.

Too many miles on mine to make it worthwhile to fix.

I do have to laugh though, just thinking to myself that Chris needed something as big as a truck to bring down a deer.

Well, what the hay, if he can’t make a bullet bring a deer down, why not his truck?

It seemed to work, or did it? In his column, he doesn’t talk about how big the deer was, or if it even died.

You know what I think? Maybe it wasn’t a deer at all, but just a Holstein cow.

If I ever go over to Chris’s for supper and he is serving deer meat, I’ll know for sure, if it tastes suspiciously like hamburger.

I do feel bad now. Chris, don’t wreck any more of your vehicles just to get a deer.

Don’t worry, one day you’ll find your groove deer hunting, and we’ll then wipe the slate clean and start our competition over.