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Tips on how to be cheap

Dec. 1, 2008

by HJ and ED Editor Lynda Jensen

Prompted by the economy, I decided to reprise a column written this time of year in 2002.

I happen to know a horde of financially conservative people (being married to one), and thought it would be easy to assemble a collection of tips on how to be cheap.

Mind you, I had to chase people over this, and it was a little labor intensive; but it was worth it.

Tips on how to be cheap (circa 2002):

• Work nights and weekends. This will cut down on your social life and naturally, the expenses that are associated with it. Tip by Aaron S.

• Have your wife cook instead of eating out. Tip by Julie Y. (head cook)

• Don’t have a girlfriend. Tip by Jami B. (he is now married).

• Bargain for everything. Tip by Denise R.

• Free lunches can be obtained by betting with co-workers for lunch. Tip by Ryan G. (he still does this).

• You can eat turkey ham sandwiches all week for what it costs to order out one meal. Tip by Dale K.

• Stuff those little dairy creamers into your purse when you eat out. (My grandma used to do this).

• Re-use plastic utensils. Tip by LuAnn D.’s mother-in-law

• Everyone should buy their own Christmas presents. Annual tip given by my husband, originally quoted from Newt Gingrich.

• Advertise with Herald Journal Publishing. Tip by “Kiss-Up” Neil S. (Neil owns the Blue Note now).

• Don’t spend any money. Tip by Lue L.

New tips on how to be cheap (2008)

• Plan meals around sample day at the grocery store and tasting day at the liquor store. For entertainment, go on brewery and winery tours and sample the products. Ivan R.

• Don’t have kids! Cheri (a surprising piece of advice from someone who loves kids and is a natural mother, too).

• Read books from the library, don’t buy them and don’t read the Internet (electricity) - Matt K.

• Do not bring your children with you when you go shopping, anywhere – Target, the grocery store or even the gas station. Jen B.

Honor worthy of the man – Bob Hope

The post office recently unveiled a first class stamp to honor comedian Bob Hope (1903-2003).

I am a fan of Bob Hope, who is well-named. He wasn’t just a comic, but a man with vision and compassion, who spent his lifetime entertaining troops.

His brand of laughter welled from a spontaneous pool of honest talent – not the cheap comedy of today that sometimes relies on bawdy jokes.

This time of year would always find Hope entertaining troops, whether during war or peace.

Throughout World War II, with only two exceptions, all of Bob’s radio shows were performed and aired from military bases and installations throughout the United States and theaters of war in Europe and the South Pacific, according to his web site, www.bobhope.com.

In 1948, Hope started a regular habit of spending nearly every Christmas entertaining troops whether during war or at peace. In 1972, at the end of the Vietnam War, he said this was his “last Christmas show.”

But each Christmas that followed, he was somewhere in the country doing a show at a military base or veterans hospital.

In 1983, he was in Beirut. In 1987, he was on a ship in the Pacific, Atlantic and Indian oceans and in the Persian Gulf. He embarked on a goodwill tour in May 1990 to entertain military personnel stationed in England, Russia, and Germany.

At Christmas that year, he and wife Dolores were in Saudi Arabia entertaining the men and women of “Operation Desert Storm.”

Hope was honored five times by Congress; but, in October 1997, he received one of his greatest tributes when Resolution 75 was unanimously passed by members of both houses making him an honorary veteran – the first person so honored in the history of the United States.

The price of honesty

Professional golfer JP Hayes discovered that he accidentally used a prototype golf ball on two shots that was not approved for competition by the Golf Association during the second stage of the PGA Tour qualifying tournament a few weeks ago in Texas.

No one would have known – except for himself and God, he told a reporter. A full-time spot on the PGA Tour in 2009 was on the line. Nevertheless, Hayes turned himself in and was disqualified.

Who said that sports figures are poor role models? (I did, and still do). But, not this one. Good for him.

Quote to remember

“A man can no more diminish God’s glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, ‘darkness’ on the walls of his cell.” CS Lewis