One of the best gifts you can give your children is to treat your spouse with love, respect, and dignity. Dr. Phil has said this in his books and on his show.
Each day when we wake up, we should ask ourselves, “What can I do today to make my husband/wife happy?”
These are both powerful statements.
Sometimes we take our spouses for granted. We go through our day-to-day activities, and many times, our spouses are on the bottom of that to-do list, or nonexistent.
I know I take my husband for granted in my daily duties, and I shouldn’t do this. My children are always at the top of my list, and my husband should be, too.
I think, as Dr. Phil has suggested, that we need to consciously ask ourselves that question daily, “What can I do today to make my spouse’s life better?”
And most of the time, that answer is very simple a verbal expression of love, a cup of coffee, an interest in how his day went, or an affirmation of how important he is to your family.
I am lucky. I am at the top of my spouse’s daily list. He always expresses his love for me, and his appreciation of me as his wife and mother of our children.
He calls me every day during the work day at my lunch break, or after school to check in; or he emails me, just to see how my day is going when he has a million things he is responsible for at his job.
How we treat our spouses is definitely a life lesson for our children. The things we say to our spouses, and the tone we use teaches our children how they should treat others, especially significant people in their lives.
I often tell my children what a great father they have, especially when he has laid down the law.
A major pet peeve of mine is when a parent talks to their children negatively about the other parent, because of an argument that had nothing to do with the children. This is immature behavior on the part of the complaining parent. A child is not who we should turn to, to complain about our spouses.
My husband and I have whittled weekly time away for each other. We often go for walks and do other activities with one another.
We have also started “pizza date night.” Usually on a Friday, after work, he and I travel to some pizza place and rate the pizzas (just for ourselves, but I have thought of starting a pizza review article).
We set a budget, usually around $20 for the night, which includes the pizza and beverage.
It is just a fun, non-stressful time that we share together. My husband and I have always been good at communicating with each other, but this pizza night provides an opportunity for us to share, talk, laugh, and just plain enjoy each other’s company. It is a time of reconnecting from the hectic week.
The date usually is about two hours long, including the drive there and back, wherever it may be. Those two hours have become something my husband and I treasure.
Maybe a New Year’s resolution can include a committed effort to make our spouses happy, to let them know how important they are.
This is truly a gift that spills over to our children.