Jim O'Leary

Waverly Star

By Jim O'Leary

An e-mail newsletter for and about Waverly people, used with permission in the HLW Herald and on this web site.

May 20, 2002

This item appeared in The Waverly Star for May 25, 1933:

"Sixty-five children received Solemn First Holy Communion at St. Mary's Church this week. Thirty nine of them were from St. Mary's School, and the remaining 26 attend other schools in the vicinity.

"Daniel Reinert, as master of ceremonies, led the procession, which formed at the school and proceeded to the church where the center row of pews were reserved for the class.

"He was followed by two angels portrayed by Masters Billy Donney and Frederick Kunde. Next in line were the six flower girls: Frances Gritz, Barbara Berkner, Jeanne Reardon, Lorraine Gagnon, Marjorie Padden, and Frances Copeland. The communion class were next in line.

"Appropriate hymns were rendered during the Mass by St. Mary's Choir. Reverend Charles Morgan read the Mass and distributed Holy Communion.

"He preached a sermon, which was intended as instruction to the children, but which might well be taken by the adults present as well.

"At 3 p.m. in the afternoon, the First Communicants returned to the church to renew their baptismal vows."

2002 First Communion class St. Mary's Parish Bulletin for 2002:

"Please keep the following students in your prayers. They will be receiving the Sacrament of Holy Communion for the first time next weekend:

Lindsey Cafferty, Dominic Gilmer, William Jaros, Shaley Karels, Shyna Krause, Lane Otto, Samantha Marketon, Jackson Rozske, Jake Theisen, Anastasia Cox, Katie Hirsch, Kelsey Jenkins, Timothy Karels, Shea Lammers, Sarah Marketon, Joseph Painschab, Christian Sterner, Jordan Wehr, Shannon Fall, Valerie Jagodzinski, George Karels III, Ariel Kocher, Heather Lehner, Allan Stohl, Nicholas Mattson, Laura Pettit.

Confirmation

Sarah Arlien, Barbara Borrell, Melissa Gerardy, Joanna Jacques, Jeana Kunkel, Nicole Paumen, Zachary Schmitz, Amanda Bartos, Sandy Decker, Michelle Grieger, Joseph Karels, Lindsay Lockwood, Kelly Poppler, Breanna Westrup, Stephanie Boeson, Nathan Drusch, Amanda Gulstad, Jeremy Kittock, Sarah Millerbernd, Nicholas Schmitz, Christine Wren.

Eeekmail again

Following up on my recommendations on subscribing to the Internet, I offer the following as a public service.

For you grandmas and grandpas who are thinking about getting into electronic mail on the Internet so you can keep up with your grandchildren, I offer some more e-mail language tips in the form of your descendants current usage.

BRB means "Be Right Back." This can signal the fact they will leave the computer, and you, hanging on for a long, long time while they go to the bathroom or borrow some money from their parents, or answer their cell phone, or go to the mall.

"Be right back" is definitely an annoying indefinite period of time, so go listen to the Twins game or something.

ASL means they are asking for your age, your gender, and your location. If you tell them, as I do, that I am: 70, male, Texas, that is the last you will hear from them. They want to chat with their peers, and who can blame them.

"Chat." Their conversation consists of the following: "Sup" (This means "What is up?" or "What is happening?"

In other words, it is not a request for information. If they are in school, they are already overdosed on information.

The answer, if you are cool, is "s'ok," which does not mean everything is okay. As for the rest of it, I will let you eavesdrop for yourself, but be prepared for four letter words, the like of which used to call for soap in the mouth and in my humble opinion (IMHO), should still call down the wrath of a prude such as myself.

Courtesy ­ all is not lost with our young when it comes to being polite on the Internet. It's called "flaming" when you deliver a "rant" to someone with whom you disagree over something or other, usually the quality of some song, movie, or television program.

Perhaps you will be saddened by the information that "professional" wrestling and automobile racing are the most watched events on television. "Professional" wrestling is to real wrestling as astrology is to real astronomy. Just ask the guys on the high school wrestling team what they think of it.

Youth who offend you on the internet are likely to tell you "sry," ("sorry") and if you say something nice to them, you can expect a "ty" ("thank you").

Your answer, of course, should be "yw" ("You are welcome.")

Plunging further into the etiquette of the Internet, in case you are a senior citizen beginner, "LOL" is "laugh out loud" or in lower case, "lol" which isn't quite the hearty laugh the capital letters indicate. If you are like me, you will object to the introduction of the "smiley face" into our culture. The internet version is :).

It is not that they are not pious and well meaning, because sometimes they are. Here, for your edification, is the Lord's Prayer in the language of the Internet:

dad@hvn, ursphl. we want wot u want&urth2b like hvn.

giv us food&giv r sins lyk we 4giv uvaz.

don't test us! save us! bcos we kno ur boss, ur tuf&ur cool 4 eva! ok?

(This is the Protestant version of the Lord's Prayer. The Catholic version ends with "save us!")

I will end this column with this message plucked from the Internet and probably not written by an actual child, but a virtual child, something one can find only on the Internet. If this convinces you good Minnesota people not to run off to Arizona, so much the better.

"Grandpa got retarded and they move to Arizona. Now they live in a place with a lot of other retarded people.

"They live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass. They ride around on tricycles and wear name tags, because they don't know who they are any more.

"They go to a building called a wrecked center, but they must have got it fixed because it is all right now. They play games and do exercises there.

"There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with their hats on. I guess they don't know how to swim.

"At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out. Then they go cruising in their golf carts.

"My grandma used to bake cookies and stuff, but I guess she forgot how. Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And they eat the same thing every night, Early Birds.

"Some of the people can't get past the man in the doll house to go out, so the ones who go out bring back food to the wrecked center and call it pot luck.

"My grandma says grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded some day too.

"When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out so they can visit their grandchildren."

Jim O'Leary
Corpus Christi, Texas.

Please send me material, even if it's stolen from the Internet.


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